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You know... when you've got less and less to prove... well, it's a nice feeling.

I haven't felt like my usual angst-ridden self, lately. Which means that I haven't felt all that compelled to write. I suppose the products we turn out have to come from something, and my something has been lacking. I write to calm myself. To understand myself. To let the world know that I am not just a nice collared shirt and a scathing one-liner. I'm a thinker, god damn it. But life has definitely been better, lately. I haven't needed to calm myself or search for answers because life's starting to fall into place.

John and I are almost at a year and we're not panting. We're powering through and looking ahead. Always escalating. He's pointed me in the right direction, as far as finances go, and now, I am supporting myself and occasionally enjoying a cab ride. Having a fairly inexpensive dinner use to set me back a whole week of work but it's now it's part of the monetary tide that I'm trying to work with.

So, I'm not stressed about men or money and I'm about to start school... so... I suppose I should start filtering the positive into my fingers.

At a loss, right now...

Gonna go to the gym and then tan... and I'm totally content with that.